Interpreting the outdoors is difficult and funny at times when you’re a man and wife team. These are some of the most popular things Justin and I say in the outdoors and how each one of us interprets it. This may not be true for all women and men but it has certainly proven true for us over the years. The trick, ladies and gentlemen, is to learn to interpret your own significant other’s interpretations. “Let’s take the kids outside.” This one took me a little while to figure out. I know how far my kids can be pushed and Justin likes to push them a little further. To me this means a risk of crying sad kids and a cranky, grumpy parent. I can’t tell you how many times I have tried to take the kids for a walk only to end up at the bottom of the driveway with all three kids crying. No. Fun. Women: Let’s pack some snacks and find a trail. Men: Let’s go on an adventure where someone is likely to get hurt. “Can you pack a bag for the kids?” Any mother knows when you go anywhere with kids you ALWAYS pack loads of snacks. This is to ensure no grumpiness or crying occurs. Justin will actually forget to pack snacks but by golly the kids will have the proper gear for whatever situation nature throws at them (besides hunger) Women: Did you pack lots of snacks? Men: Did you pack rain gear? “Want to check out those rocks?” A few weeks ago Justin and I went out to a pretty cool place in the national forest near our house to shoot video. When we finished he said he wanted to look for this one particular route and it should just be around the corner. Ok, fine. We ended up finding this route after having traversed a couple boulder fields and hiking down nearly the entire rock field. I have quickly learned that when he starts saying, “We don’t need to go much further” after every 50 steps or so, he means to go the whole way. Women: Hand me the binoculars. Men: Prepare for a long hike. “Did I just hear a mountain lion?” I tend to err on the side of caution. I have no desire to be in pain or eaten by things with teeth larger than my fingers. If I hear a lion, done deal, that’s it, don’t want to be any closer. Women: Pack it up, we’re going home. Men: I don’t know, let’s go look. “Want to go hiking?” This one I have had to be real careful with. Justin really enjoys hiking and when he goes out it is for really, really, really (did I say really?) long distances. A total workout where you are unable to walk the next day. This does not sound like much fun to me. When I hike I like to enjoy the scenery, chat, save the world and stop and smell the trees (seriously, ponderosa pines smell like vanilla. Yum!). Women: Sure, I’d love to chat outside. Men: We’ll be climbing a 14,000’ peak. “I need to pee.” Everytime I turn around, when we are hiking, Justin is peeing off the side of the trail. No. Fair. Sometimes I wish I was a dude. It would be so much easier to pee in the outdoors. Women: Drip-dry. Men: Where’s a tree? “Let’s go camping.” This one may seem like I am a wuss but I really do enjoy camping, just not killing myself in the process to enjoy the activity. Car camping is great because you can see fun touristy sites, bring the kids along, and they won’t whine about carrying stuff. Ease in the outdoors, that’s me. Women: Load up the car. Men: Load up the backpack. “Want to go for a run?” I just recently began running for fun. A way to get a little exercise and get outside. I enjoy running when, again, I am not killing myself. Getting hurt is not my idea of fun and 20 or 35 miles spells hurt for me (maybe thats just because I’m in bad shape though). Women: I’d like to talk and a slow jog is a great way to get out of the house. Men: Are you thinking 20 or 35 miles?